What Is Forgiveness?

Forgiveness is a mystery. Generally it means a chance to start over with a relationship or a debt or an obligation. Sometimes there is an apology, or money owed is written off as a bad debt, or someone moves back home. Forgiveness in human parlance and relationships implies that the offense is no longer considered a part of the deal.

Sometimes people may say, “I’ll forgive, but I can’t forget.” But there is the catch–forgiveness can’t take away the memory of an injury or a betrayal or loss. God alone forgives and forgets. He removes our sins from us and they no longer hinder our relationship, but our family, friends, and business associates can’t do that.

In human terms, forgiveness has a deeper meaning than love or respect, and it requires more from the person who has been insulted or wounded than from the one who seeks to be forgiven. One problem with forgiveness stems from our perception of an insult. Thinking differently about an issue is not an insult to the other party. It is simply a difference of opinion. I like Mexican food and you can’t stand it. I haven’t insulted you but I would not expect you to agree to a dinner date to eat Mexican food. You would be insulted if I invited me to my home and served very spicy food that I knew you didn’t care for or was allergic to. Now we have an insult that could compromise a friendship. That would require an apology or some act of contrition.

Sometimes people have habits or mannerisms that others dislike and avoid being in their presence. The individuals avoid contact because they are uncomfortable. The avoidance is not intended to be an insult, but the person with the mannerism is unaware of a cooling in the relationship.

Most of us try to avoid the issue that causes problems. Maybe if we ignore it, it will go away. But if the friend claims foul, you have to deal with it up front. Get a grip, guys. Forgiveness goes both ways. We forgive each other, and move on.

 

When you call f…

When you call for help and no one comes, strive on, strive on alone. Rabindranath Tagore

I found the quote some years ago, and found it encouraging. It does not promise success or relief from stress or power or victory over enemies. It does recognize that we sometimes labor without success.  We like to think that anything we set out minds to we can accomplish.

Whatever goals or dreams we have will never materialize if we don’t believe in it, but the fortitude to strive on, alone if necessary, is a mark of integrity in the work. I value that.

 

Remembering Christmas

I’m thinking of the things I will remember about Christmas of 2014. I’ll remember that Carol (my daughter) was in the hospital about a week before Christmas with an abscess in her foot; I was scared for her, but they never found out what caused it. She came home with not further complications. I was very thankful.

I’ll remember that I got Shania a disc of “Cats.” Her cat died this year. I hope she enjoys the show. I was moved by it when I saw it broadcast and I was not even emotionally connected to a cat.

I’ll remember that I spent time this year remembering other years and other people and other joys. I taught Sunday school twice with theme that relate to the joy and glory of Christmas that gave me joy and glory. Maybe that’s why I enjoyed it so much this year.

Heroes

I have some heroes, some individuals who inspire me; its reassuring to read their stories again. Some detail I had forgotten or neglected usually prompts renewed awe in me. Yes, I read new stuff, too. New people spur me on to enlarge my experience, but they are, sometimes, compared to the former examples of honesty, fortitude, and diligence. My newest hero is Rabindranath Tagore. He was an Indian who lived and worked in Bengal. He was awarded the the Nobel Prize for Literature in 1913, and he was the first Asian citizen to win the prize. He wrote short stories and poetry and was widely acclaimed. But I have only recently become aware of his contribution to the discipline of literature.

Forgiveness is …

Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.
Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/m/marktwain109919.html#LVzaOBSTQuRPEkPB.99

Dental Work

I went to the dentist this morning. I entered the office with a bloody nose. Nothing against the dentist, he didn’t cause the blood. But I did find it a somewhat negative omen.

I was right. He and the assistant performed a numbing procedure. The shot was almost painless, but when you have two people with power equipment in your mouth, it’s hard to remember what you thought pain would mean.

He was cute. He said, “Relax.” I complimented his sense of humor. I think I could have fought them off if I had a water hose; they weren’t very aggressive, just persistent.

The numbing worked. It’s been three hours and my mouth still feels like the floor of the barn. I just have one more appointment to get the permanent bridge. The only pain that should cause will be in the check book.

Solitude

I am learning new respect for the hermits and solitaries among us. Thomas Merton has been one of my heroes for a long time, but since my husband died and I moved to the RGV, I am a “solitary,” but not by choice. I occupy my time with writing blogs, and poetry, and other frivolities, and reading poetry and the Bible. I do occasionally fix a meal and wash clothes. I watch a lot of TV, but it is very boring. Most of it is old re-runs from a former time. This sort of speaks to the barrenness of my life. My only venture into the world populated by live people is Church attendance and Bible study. It is incumbent on me to find a way to fill my time with stimulating ideas and activities.

Since my time was always used to fill the needs of other people, I am currently without purpose and totally useless. The time is now to become a better person in the use of the blogs. I do love them. I love to expound of subjects in which I am not an expert, but I get to have an opinion. I get to read up on events and ideas and share what I learn. It’s not terribly original, but it’s fun. When you write a blog, you hope to get readers. I don’t get many, but I value the ones I do. I hope they are having a good day and I hope my input is helpful to them. I guess that’s the bottom line: that my readers expand their horizons and look for new adventures. When you are isolated and alone, touching someone’s life is a really big deal. I have told people I am becoming a hermit. No, I don’t live in a shack by the railroad, or a commune, and I don’t perform extensive ceremonies of consecration, but I pretty well fit the definition. And I pray a lot.

Maybe I’ll get better at it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Blogging is Demanding

I love to write. I love to shape words into pictures and know that someone is sharing my vision or understanding my thought. It sounds sort of selfish when I read what I just wrote. I should be thinking about the benefit to the reader, not my own vanity, but there you have it. Writing is really for me. If you get something out of it, that’s good, but , lets face it: I do this for me. I live alone and I need something to keep me busy and occupied. Writing is the best thing I’ve found.

But Blogging takes things a step further. It assumes a reader. Someone may happen on my blog and respond, or take up a challenge, or go on a crusade. This month is International Poetry Month, so this month I have written a poem everyday in response to a prompt provided by Robert Lee Brewer, the Poetry guru from Writer’s Digest. I don’t think I’ve written anything worthy of bragging about, but it’s been fun. It has assured me that I need to keep at it. I need to refine my skills. I need to explore themes. I need to read new writers. I think October is the month designated for writing a novel in a month. I have never attempted a novel. Maybe this is the year.

If you are so inclined, you might want to take up writing as your “go to” activity  for free time. Or maybe you already do. Maybe you write a blog, or poetry. Do you share it? Do you give it as gifts? Do you leave it for friends and lovers to find? Am I getting to personal? Maybe so. Anyway, I just want to let you know the benefits of writing are beyond expressing. Try it. You might like it. Read my poetry at poetryinmysoul.blogspot.com.

Poem A Day for International Poetry Month

Read, write, and share poetry this month. You still have a few days to get into the action and enjoy poetry. Pick up your favorite book and share a poem here. Or write a new one and share it here. Or read one out loud to a friend, assuming he is really a friend, or just soak in the warm water of poetry in you meditative moments and let it restore you soul.

I have written a poem every day during this month from the prompts provided by Robert Lee Brewer who writes for Writer Digest Magazine. You can get the prompts from the magazine or from Robert’s Tweets. Check them out. You might find a new passion. It’s worth a try.

It might give your life new meaning! Read the prompts and poems here: poetryinmybones.blogspot.com

 

Being Alone

I am gaining a new respect for being alone. I have a problem with that. I keep hearing a noise in the other room and wonder who’s there.

No one.

I am alone.

Being alone is not lonely, at least, not until you dwell on the thought. I like being alone. Yesterday I came home from Church, and I was so glad to be alone. To be able to make choices in which I didn’t have to defer to anyone. Didn’t have to consult anyone. Didn’t have to please anyone. Sometimes I even feel guilty about the selfishness of it.  Sometimes the noise in the other room, I think must be you, honey. But I always remember that you are gone.

I really am alone. I can write anytime I want to and sometimes I get a lot out of it. I learn new stuff when I write. I learn who I am by it, and what I want, and how I feel about things. I can say I like things and not really mean it. I can eat things that I wouldn’t buy myself, and give the cook praise and vow never to make it. But It’s harder to write things I don’t believe and stand by them. Writing things that get everlasting life by putting it on paper places a heavy responsibility on me for valuing the integrity of what I write. It has to be true; it has to stand the test of time.